Thursday, August 28, 2014

SALTY

sometimes, i can't get over utah. there's always something new that totally excites me & blows my mind. this time, it was the salt flats. i have seen photos & heard about the salt flats. i even drove by them once on our way to san francisco, but as fate would have it, i was asleep & completely missed them. so when tayler came up with the idea to take photos with colored smoke bombs (more on that later) at the salt flats, i was in. & i was so excited to go.

the days leading up to going to the salt flats were super rainy, so i was worried we wouldn't be able to go. luckily for us though, last wednesday was bright & sunny. we drove an hour & a half out there to discover a huge gray cloud inching towards the salt flats & a ton of wind (we hadn't really thought about checking out the wind). so we hurried out onto the salt flats to get some pictures & gave the colored smoke bombs a shot. the wind kind made the smoke bombs a little difficult, understandably, but we still got a whole lot of pretty cool pictures out of the whole experience.

i just cannot believe that the salt flats are only an hour & a half away, or that the exist at all. it's crazy. they are a huge area of just pure, white, salty ground. they are seriously so cool, if you have never been & have the opportunity, you should definitely go. it's pretty much heaven for a salt lover like me. & yes, i did lick the salt, just for good measure.

Monday, August 25, 2014

INTO THE UINTAS

over the weekend we ventured into the uintas with our friend blake, for some good old fashioned adventuring. we wanted to wander around, possibly find a spot to fish & i was hoping to get some good pictures. all was a success until we got there & i realized i didn't have my memory card in my camera! ultimate fail on my part... but thank goodness for iphones. 
the boys tried to catch some fish, cedar & i played with the rocks, dirt & flowers & we found a beaver dam, which was so cool! blake & i had never seen one before, so we ere pretty excited about it. it was a really perfect was to spend the day.

Friday, August 22, 2014

cedar-isms

in my opinion, cedar has been extremely adorable recently. i cannot get over it. he has the best little personality, he is the absolute best buddy to have by my side every day. a few things i'm especially loving about cedar right at this moment are 
1. his love for tiny spaces \\ cedar is constantly wedging himself into the smallest space he can find: between the couch & side table, little slots within a table, under dining room chairs, in buckets or the box diapers come in... anything. he wants to be inside it.
2. the way he pats my back when i pick him up & hug him. it. is. adorable.
3. the quick rummaging every morning for his blankets \\ every time i go & get him from his crib he moves SO quickly to grab anything in his crib, blankets, stuffed animal, pacifier.. anything, as if he's scared he will never see them again. so along with cedar, his blankets & stuffies also make it to breakfast.
4. the fact that he jumps nervously at the beginning of toy story every single time he watches it.
5. anytime he goes into the kitchen he goes "mmmm-mmm!" & points towards the fridge & where the bananas are kept. 
6. his love of tomatoes \\ anytime we check on the garden, cedar picks all of the red tomatoes he can reach. he always spits out his first bite. & then continues picking & eating one bite out of every tomato & leaving the leftovers in a pile.
7. the fact that he tries to tickle my feet & makes little tickle noises.
8. that he always sits on his rocking ship while watching a movie & goes wild rocking it.
9. how he picks up one of his blankets & pacifiers if he's sleepy.
10. the way he hyperventilates from excitement at the site of ducks, horses or dogs being anywhere near him. 

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

REAL TALK \\ a journal entry

sometimes it's easier for me to express myself with physical pen & paper. does that ever happen to you? i've been wanting to write about my thoughts & feelings about our upcoming move, but haven't been able to write what i wanted to say. i hit a road block. but the other night i was looking through my journal after writing some quotes down & found one i wrote not too long ago & thought i'd share it.
images: pinterest // tumblr

i've wanted to live in europe since i was 11. anywhere in europe, i would take it.
one of the first times austin & i hung out he told me he would love to live in spain, i thought about it for a nanosecond & told him i could be happy living there too. that was the night i also told him he had to marry me. i guess i was feeling really brave that night.

2.5 years later & we are moving to madrid, spain. our far off dream is now our upcoming reality.
i know it is going to be difficult & in all honesty, it scares me. i know i am in no way prepared for the isolation i am going to feel, but i also know that it is going to be one of the best years of our life.

the two questions people ask me the most: "are you ready?" & "are you excited?" no, i am not ready & i really don't think i ever could be. & i have so many emotions about our upcoming move. i am beyond excited, but i am slightly terrified, sometimes i'm really sad about it, as crazy as it sounds, & i'm still shocked that it is actually happening.

yes i want an adventure, crave an adventure. i always have. but this is not the typical adventure, it isn't like anything i have done before. i have never uprooted to a completely foreign place. i have never had to leave the things in which i find comfort in. i have never left everything familiar to me.

some days i want to cry at the thought of leaving, others i cannot get over the excitement to actually be there & live our life there. & i cannot help but look at all that we are leaving behind & sacrificing to have our dream, to live our adventure.

it's a complete tug-of-war on my emotions. i know that when we come back that we won't be coming back to the same place. the likelihood of us coming back to utah is extremely slim, & i know that life in general won't be the same when we're back. & that's ok, because that's life.

but to know i will never be in this moment, this place, makes me sad. i love where we are. i love all the time austin & i have to be together, to do whatever it is we want. i adore this stage of cedars life. he is so incredibly cute, happy & fun to spend our days with. we're never going to be here again & it breaks my heart.

i am in love with right now.

but as our departure creeps up on us i cannot wait to experience it.

as much as my heart breaks it is rebuilt with the thought of what lies ahead. i am eager to be removed, to have an opportunity just to be us. there is something slightly refreshing about the thought of being in an unknown place where you are also unknown. it's a brand new start to a brand new story.

Monday, August 18, 2014

WILD.

while we were in costa rica i read three books : Wild, The Language of Flowers, & #Girlboss.
they were all so, so good & i would definitely recommend them all. buuuut the one that really stuck with me was wild. i could not stop reading it.
WILD is a true story about a women in her mid 20's who after many life changing events goes soul/life searching while on the pacific crest trail (pct), a hike that starts in mexico & ends in canada. the book documents the events leading up to her decision to go on the hike & everything she encounters throughout the hike. the author used her journal entries from the time to write her story & it is so inspiring. the book was seriously a page turner for me, i couldn't stop reading it. plus, there's a movie about it, so check out the trailer HERE.

"until now, i hadn't truly understood the world's vastness--hadn't even understood how vast a mile could be-until each mile was beheld at walking speed. and yet there was also its opposite, the strange intimacy i'd come to have with the trail, the way the piƱon pines and monkey flowers i passed that morning, the shallow streams i crossed, felt familiar and known, though i'd never passed them or crossed them before."

the book had so many quotes that i loved. i was constantly underlining different things.