an end to a chapter

this is me, on my last day as a college student.
after transferring schools 2x's, moving apartments/houses 6x's, changing my major 5x's, getting married & having a baby, i am  d o n e.

i took my last two finals today & couldn't be more relieved. i've felt so much anxiety these past couple of weeks, it's insane. i've never been so nervous for finals before, & i think it's because it's my last semester. you'd think by now i would have learned not to procrastinate. but no. i still leave studying to the day of the test, & paper writing to the day that it is due. but it's all over, thankfully.

school has been the life i've always known. it's surreal to think that it's actually over. i've been a little sad thinking of it coming to an end. i love school. not the papers & test aspect, but learning & being in school. i'm happy that i didn't rush through it. i took my time. took all the courses i wanted to take. tested different majors, all art related. experienced a million new & different things. found my passions & learned new skills. i've grown a lot.

it's crazy to think about all of the time i have spent in school. it's taken me longer than it takes most, but it's been a really amazing experience. looking back at the time i've spent in college is sort of crazy. even though a lot has changed in every aspect of my life, i still feel like the 18 year old i was when i very first began.

a quote for the day

currently, life consists of finals & writing papers.
so it's a slow blogging week. but as of next monday,
i will be  d o n e & 
i cannot wait.

it was a good weekend.

austin surprised me thursday night with a nail appointment for friday morning at one of my favorite places that offers any sort of nail design you can think of. i haven't gone forever & have been stupidly stressed with school, so i was really excited when he told me about the appointment. he's pretty thoughtful. afterwards was spent running errands before going downtown to go to the gallery stroll. i love the gallery stroll. it happens once a month around 2nd & 2nd down town & is so great. different stores open up displaying artists work along the block with drinks & food. i haven't been to the gallery stroll in years, so i loved going.
we went to meet up with a couple friends that came down from logan to see a mutual friends graduate art show, & then to see our friends painting teachers gallery, which is where the painting above is from.
saturday was spent finishing a buddha statue i've been making for one of my finals tomorrow & making a trip to the mall before grabbing some thai food with some friends & a failed attempt at hot tubbing. 
& of course, easter sunday. we went to church & to austin's parents to have easter dinner & an egg hunt for all kids. austin & i got to play easter bunny & hide the eggs, which was surprisingly more difficult than it sounds like. i had no idea what was considered too easy or too hard for 0-9 year olds. it was fun to see all the kids running around though. we tried to get cedar to go get some of his eggs, but he clearly didn't get the point, but he was really into moving the eggs from his basket back into the basket, so i guess that was fun. & cute. 
hope you all had a happy weekend & easter!

my senior thesis

remember that one time that i mentioned my senior thesis? well, it was on the importance of teaching art history to children with a focus on surrealism. i had to write the longest paper of my life & create a book based on surrealism for children. the book isn't really just for kids, but i chose to focus on a younger age group cause it seemed more fun in the moment of writing my thesis proposal. 
for the project i researched the surreal movement, how surrealism is linked to psychoanalysis, psychoanalysis in children, & why art history should be taught starting at a younger age. i covered all of that info in my paper. then i got to do the fun stuff.
i chose which artists i wanted to focus on, chose which artworks to include in the book, formatted & designed the layout, & then i got it printed. i'm still waiting it's arrival, but it's a little, hardcover coffee-table book. 
it was surprisingly harder than i had imagined it would be. there were so many artists & artworks i wanted to include, but i had to keep it down to a small number of pages, since it is technically for children. it was also difficult because a lot of surreal art that i love isn't quite appropriate for some kids.. so i had to be pretty careful in choosing the images. but overall, i'm really happy with how it turned out. 

garden party

thursday was a  b e a u t i f u l day. plain & simple. i'm so excited for spring & summer that are coming right around the corner. it's the best feeling. today was a good day. i took a nap, the 3 of us went on a walk around town, went to the grocery store & had a garden party. we brought lunch home & enjoyed the warmth & sunshine by eating it outside. i can't wait for school to be over so that my days can consist of garden party days, because they are the best. 
sandals: dolce vita
top: anthropologie 

# 1 fan

i don't know what i would do without these. & i can't believe how long it took me to get them. i have wanted essential oils for a very, very long time. i have had eucalyptus and lavender for a while, but i wanted more. i just could never bring myself to actually buy them. oils are expensive! every single time we were at whole foods i would go through & look at all the oils, smell them & wish i had them, but i couldn't do it. i couldn't justify to myself spending $20 or $40 on a tiny bottle of oil.

then, one weekend when my mom was in town & cedar was sick, she said how one of her friends was telling her how great essential oils are & how helpful, & that maybe we should get some for cedar. after she mentioned that it would be a good idea, i immediately sparked up! & told her how badly i've wanted some, but can't bring myself to buy them. that we got eucalyptus so i can put it in cedars humidifier at night to help him breath & hopefully prevent colds, but that was all we had.

after that weekend, my mom being the incredibly giving & nice mom that she is, offered to buy us one of the doterra essential oil kits. i was so excited. everyday i would hope that the box would arrive & when it finally did i was the happiest.

since getting the oils i have literally used them daily. i use them on myself, i use them for cedar & i have gotten austin to use them. i've made candles with them, used a couple of flavoring food & drinks. i put them in my hair. i use them a lot. i love them. i never want to go without them again. they truly are so great & can be used for SO many different things. if you have never used essential oils, i highly recommend that you try them, they are worth the money. i promise.

a few of my favorite & most used oils are:
lavender- sometimes if cedar is having a rough night sleeping i rub a drop onto his feet to calm him & i put it in my hair sometimes, as well as my wrists to smell if i'm feeling restless

digestZen- austin & i both get stomach aches ALOT. i rub this on my belly & it helps so, so much.

frankincense- i have really dry skin, so i mix this with my face lotion a couple days a week. it's also really good for bug bites to help itching & makes them go away quicker.

breathe- i put it in cedars humidifier when he sleeps a couple nights a week. i also will dilute it with coconut oil & rub it on his chest to help if he has a cough &/or cold. it helps open airways for breathing, especially if he has a cold.

days like these

in life i have learned that some days are easier than others & for no necessary reason some days are harder. lately, life has been feeling a little different for me. it hasn't been hard, but i have been unmotivated to do hardly anything. unmotivated in school, unmotivated to workout, unmotivated to plan/attend activities, unmotivated. i don't know what has brought it on, but this new feeling has been here longer than i would like.

my life right now is perfect. both austin & i will be graduating at the end of this month, cedar is adorable, fun & happy, great friends & family, & we have this  h u g e  adventure ahead of us. there is no reason for me to feel unmotivated or lethargic towards life, but i guess thats how i feel.

before i had cedar whenever i had these feelings i would get it out through drawing or painting, rock climbing & yoga. i had a vent. i was able to have the freedom to do these things whenever i wanted. after having cedar i've realized that the quality ME time i truly loved is harder & harder to find. i would never trade places with my old life, having this adorable little baby to watch grow & learn that i love more than anything has been, by far the biggest blessing & best adventure i can ever imagine. it just means that i have to readjust a few aspects my life.

there are so many changes that are happening in our life right now that i find myself wishing for more ME time. for the chance to gather my thoughts & feelings, express them in one way or another, whether in my journal, painting or through yoga. a way to meditate on the life i have been given & am living. i have learned some of the biggest lessons in life through doing this, but it has gotten harder to practice because my head is constantly swarming with what i must do next.

i need to remember to put myself forward. to remember that my emotional state does not only effect me, but those around me & i need to be as mentally healthy & happy as i can be. not just for those around me, but for myself. i need to remember that i'm not being a bad parent or selfish when i ask for help in order to release my own thoughts, to mentally gain control & to be healthy. there is no shame in asking for help & there is no need to feel guilty in doing so.

sidenote: the photo has nothing to do with this post. it's just one of my favorites from a trip to amsterdam in 2011

a future home.

since december we've been living in salt lake in my mom's 2nd home. it's fully furnished & decorated, so we really just moved in clothes & a couple little knick-knacks, but nothing major of ours. we didn't need to bring our dishes in or to put up pictures because it was already done. all of our things are in storage in the garage. & now that we're moving to spain, we'll be moving into a furnished apartment so that we don't have to deal with hauling all our stuff over for there. 
by the end of it all, it'll be over 2 years since living with our own things, our furniture, dishes, anything. so for now i look at things that i like online. thanks to pinterest i've been creating a dream home & gathering ideas to incorporate in a home in the future. 
right now i'm in love with wooden beams in ceilings, welcoming cozy spaces,  plush rugs on wood floors, books throughout the house, arched doorways, large windows, dark cabinets with bright accents,  open islands in the kitchen, colorful back splashes, black walls with white accents & vice versa with pops of color throughout.
follow my pinterest for more: kerryjune

a playlist

i'm not clever enough to come up with an april fools joke, so instead, here is the monthly playlist. happy april everybody!