i have so much to say about our life right now, but i can't ever find the words to put it all down! it's been such a great experience being in madrid, but it's also been an emotional & a little rough too. i don't think i expected it to be hard which sort of makes it that much harder for me & it's also a little comical i didn't think it would be hard...but despite any bad days i have or how difficult it can be, i am really loving it & am happy that we are here.
austin officially started school on monday & has been having orientation allllllll week long & he loves it. he always comes home so excited about what they've been doing, what he's learned about his program & saying that he's made new friends for us to hangout with. he's a funny one & a cute one. i love how excited he gets about school & telling me about everything. with it being his first week, it was also
my first week of being on my own + cedar, obviously, but basically on my own. so i like to think it's been a big week for all of us!
i really tried to keep cedar & i occupied but it's sort of hard when a// you aren't sure where anything is b// you don't know anyone to waste your time with c// you have zero obligations or things to do. buuut i like to think i did a good job! can't be too hard on myself, right?! we ran a couple errands throughout the week that truly had no need for even happening besides giving me something to do, we went to an expat playgroup on wednesday & the i.e. partners playgroup on friday, frequented the nearby park & went for a lot of walks, hung out at home on tuesday waiting for the internet guy to show up
(i was unbelievably excited for this), & made dinner 4/5 nights which is a big deal for me!
the days here have been both good & hard. i've had a few hiccups
(like when the guy at the little market below us waved me out of the store & wouldn't let me buy my groceries, so i left having no idea why it happened, to later find out that i didn't meet the price minimum to use my credit card...) making me feel completely isolated & a little bit numb to everything around me. i've felt like i would never understand the language & never be able to figure it out, i've felt like giving up & like not doing a single thing. but then there are the days that are perfect & i can't believe that i'm actually here. i'm living abroad, i'm living in europe, i'm living my real life dream. & that's pretty amazing. i have everything to be grateful for right now. & despite the rough days i wouldn't change my circumstance for anything.
the other night we were on a walk talking about life & our conversations tend to end on the same subject: how unreal it is that we're in madrid. given the option again of moving to madrid & knowing everything i know from being here
(for almost a month!), i would definitely choose to come here again. it feels right, it's foreign but it's comfortable, & it's starting to feel like home. it's a big city with a slow paced lifestyle & if you know me, then you know that's right up my alley. i like the leisurely walks that i take everyday to get anywhere we need to go. i like that when we're up & outside by 11 a.m. on a saturday that the shops aren't open, the streets are nearly empty but the cafes are full for a saturday morning breakfast & the parks are full of families
(grandparents, parents, children, aunts, uncles, cousins.. the whole family) watching the kids run around & play while the adults sit around with their bread, cheeses, meat & drinks talking. despite my off days, it's a really good life here in madrid.