8/16/17

DEAR CEDAR


Dear Cedar,

I love watching you learn & grow on the daily. The way you play with Milo truly melts my heart, you are always so concerned about his happiness, you worry when he cries & are always trying to make him happy. Watching your relationship is one of the absolute best things in the entire world. The sweetest memories are always going to be at bedtime when the two of you roll around giggling & hugging in your bed, Milo adores you so much & you do him. You are a boy with so many questions, always wanting to learn more & more & more, sometimes I worry I won't be able to keep up with all of the questions. I'm always getting surprised by you & all that you know, you know so many random little facts about animals & dinosaurs, it always impresses me how much you remember & sometimes it scares me just a little. You remember so much more than I do that sometimes I worry I'm going to lose the upper hand!

You are my sweet, little, tentative boy. I hope one day you realize you are bigger than your fears, that you can do anything you want & you don't limit yourself. More often than not I hear you say "I can't", but I want you know that you can, you can do anything. I understand how nervous you are & how scary trying new things can be but, don't let it hold you back. It's hard for me to hear you doubt yourself, it makes my heart ache hearing that you don't think you can do something because it scares you. My hope is for you to be the bravest boy in the world, not to let your fears limit you from doing the things you really want because that is how you will learn to grow & trust yourself. Another reason it's hard for me is because I was the same way when I was your age. I was scared of everything & it took me a long time to learn to face my fears but once I did, life became fuller. It's ok to fall, to get hurt, to scrape up your hands & knees, that is how you will learn. Sometimes we need to fall, don't let it stop you from trying again. I know that when you put your mind to it, you can accomplish anything you want love bug, now you just need to believe that.

While you may be a little tentative, you are always on the hunt for your next adventure & I hope that you don't lose that. I love all the adventures you go on, whether they're just to the backyard, hunting rocks & sea glass at the beach, pushing your limits trying to climb a tree, or swimming in the pool. I love how you make everything we do into an adventure & while it does drive me crazy at some times, I sort of like how you always have to pack a bag full of snacks even if we aren't going far or just ate.

Oooooh Cedar bug, there are so many things I can write about you at this exact moment in life. I'll be honest, you are either completely & utterly adorable & funny, or you are the hardest kid on earth. No in-between but, I wouldn't change this time for the world because those adorable moments are worth all of the hard ones. Keep being you Cedar Bug. I hope you can become confident as you grow older, know that you can achieve anything & that you never lose your sense of wonder. I love you.

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